Dear Snarky, My greedy bridesmaids have really hurt my feelings. I had a beautiful wedding on February 12 and because I didn’t want to be a bridezilla I paid for each bridesmaid’s dress. It was […]
Author: snarkyinthesuburbs
Tandem Bike Trip = Marriage Buster
I’ve been married a long-ish time. I guess I could take pride in that fact if my mother hadn’t tarnished my brain with her belief that a long marriage doesn’t always equal a good marriage. […]
Dear Snarky – Is this Baby’s Name “Two” Much?
Dear Snarky, My sister just had a baby and when she told me what she wanted to name her brand-new son I offered some advice based on my years as an elementary school teacher. Their […]
How Old Am I? I’m So Old I’ve Used Traveler’s Checks 😱
I usually don’t feel old. Am I getting old? Of course, because that’s part of the human experience. But I’ve reached the point in my, ahem, life journey where I sometimes get figuratively slapped in […]
Help Me Before I DIY Again
I don’t know what you’re doing today but I’m bracing for impending doom. This is because I’m about to embark on another round of home improvement. And I’m not even doing anything that major like […]
Dear Snarky – Office Desk Drama
Dear Snarky, I think I have been the victim of wrongful disciplinary action at work. In fact, the person who was in the wrong didn’t get in trouble at all. This has left me very […]
Being “Dog Free” Sounds Like the Worst Idea Ever
I’ve always assumed that my life would include the companionship of at least one dog. That’s been the status quo for five decades so I feel like it’s a pretty safe bet. Then the other day I […]
Dear Snarky – My In-Laws Want to Live With Us
Dear Snarky, My husband has “tentatively” given his parents’ permission to move in with us. We don’t live in a large home. It’s just three bedrooms, two baths and we have two kids, two dogs, […]
Friendship With This Cookie Never Crumbles
So far 2022 hasn’t lived up to my expectations of being the best year ever. Just kidding on that whole best year thing. I’d be thrilled if 2022 was the most normal year ever or […]
Dear Snarky – I’m Scared About a Valentine’s Day Proposal
I’m scared to death that my boyfriend is going to propose on Valentine’s Day. I heard from a friend that he’s going to do it at halftime at a basketball game at our alma mater. […]
Shovel Ready
Well, it happened. It snowed and I didn’t shovel my driveway. As alert readers may remember, last week I shared that a recent study from a consortium of cardiologists cautioned anyone over the age of […]
Dear Snarky – I Got a Fake Engagement Ring
Dear Snarky, I just found out my fiancée bought me a fake engagement ring. Technically it’s not a fake diamond but it’s definitely not a real mined diamond. After hearing Lala Kent from “Vanderpump Rules” […]
Random January Thoughts
Help me. My brain is stuck in a loop of random thoughts. I blame the myriad of mindless tasks I’ve been doing from putting up Christmas decorations to organizing my basement. It’s allowed my mind […]
Dear Snarky – My Husband Wants to Give Our Daughter the Same Name as His Ex-Fiancée 🤯
Dear Snarky, I’m pregnant with my first baby and it’s going to be a girl. I’m very excited but I’m in the middle of a baby naming nightmare with my husband. He wants to name […]
Dear Snarky – My Sister is Blackmailing my Parents
Dear Snarky, There’s some major shit going down in our family. My sister is blackmailing my parents into giving her money for a down payment on a home. It started on a family party where […]
Sharpening My Resolutions
New Year’s resolutions make me nervous. I think it’s the whole setting yourself up for failure issue once you make that resolution list. It’s not that I’m against personal self-improvement or list making. I love […]
Dear Snarky – My Parents Ruined the Holidays Forever
Dear Snarky, I can’t believe I’m writing to you and I can’t believe what just happened to me and my sisters over the holidays. The cluster f*%k started at Thanksgiving when my parents announced after […]
Repressed Memories of an Elf-less Christmas
I hate the “Elf on the Shelf.” Not dislike or harboring some discreet loathing but all out hate. Now with my youngest child being a sort of adult at 21 one would assume that my […]
Elderly Adjacent – Say What?
I’ve recently had some unsettling truths come my way and they were delivered in a one-two-punch. The first salvo was fired while I was in my self designated “safe space” – Target. There I was at […]
Holiday Guilt – The Gift that Keeps on Giving
Traditions are the glue that keep the holidays intact. They provide a road map for how each family celebrates. Traditions even dictate timelines like when you put your tree up and whether you open presents on […]
Stuffed With Supply Chain Snafus
I’ve learned so much about supply chains these last few months that I feel like I’ve just completed an upper-level business school course and expanded my vocabulary. For instance, I have recently discovered that a chassis […]
Plagues and Bears, Oh my!
I’m currently recovering from a near death experience. Well, to be honest it’s more like a close call that brought me near death adjacent or maybe it would be more accurate to say that I […]
American Buttercream for the Win
Right now, I have five different kinds of flour in my pantry – cake, almond, pastry, bread and all purpose. I’m seriously trying to up my game in the baking department. Blame it on the […]
Dear Snarky – Jerk Alert! An Almost Family Member is Planning on Using Supply Chain Issues as an Excuse to Not Buy Christmas Gifts
Dear Snarky, My brother-in-law’s fiancée “Taylor” is shady AF. We had a family dinner last week and she made a big deal of asking all her future nieces and nephews what they wanted for Christmas […]
Diss-Armed
I’m doing something I’ve never done before and it’s swimming laps when it’s not summer. I’ve never pegged myself as an indoor pool person but now I’m flutter kicking my way through the fall. To […]
Dissecting My Halloween Addiction 🎃👻☠️
I thought my love affair with Halloween would taper off once my kids stopped trick-or-treating. It didn’t. Then I told myself when I had full-fledged adult children I would release my death grip on my […]
All Aboard the Football Agony Express
I don’t like emotional rollercoasters. Throughout my life I have tried to studiously avoid anything and anyone that makes my life resemble riding the Mamba (a hyper coaster) at Worlds of Fun. For the life […]
Help Snarky – My Twin is Dating My Ex-Husband
Dear Snarky, I’ve got a big problem with my (not identical) twin sister. She’s dating my ex-husband and we’ve only been officially divorced for six months. My whole family is WTF about this but my […]
What Happened to Nice? 🥴
Umm, is everyone okay? Because I’m starting to think that society as a whole is losing their grip. There are signs everywhere, like literal signs in my Kansas hometown, the bastion of Midwest friendly, asking/pleading […]
Dear Snarky – Should I Go to H.R. About my creepy boss?
Dear Snarky, I feel like I have a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other. My problem is that my married boss is fooling around with a very young co-worker (also one […]
Bearded Wonder
I thought I had mercifully escaped all the pandemic grooming issues. In the early days when salons were shut down, I had to do my own gray hair color remediation. While it wasn’t a complete […]
Dear Snarky – A Friend Used my Pre-Schooler to Boost Her TikTok Views
Dear Snarky, I’m really mad about something and when I told some friends what I was mad about they said I was overreacting and should take what happened as a compliment. I have a four-year-old […]
Fall Lust🍁
It’s almost 90 degrees out but I just bought myself two sweaters. Not light weight sweaters, mind you, but bulky cable knit wonders that shout cozy. Do I need another sweater, never mind two more […]
Wishing for a Normal Year of College
I’ve just dropped my last child off to her last year of college. It’s a funny thing that whole leaving your kids behind at school. Of course, the freshman year move in is brutal. Besides […]
Let the Football Drama Begin
One day people, one day until my husband enters into either a downward spiral or experiences euphoria. This is because on Saturday, September 4 the University of Texas begins its 128th football season. And not just […]
Dear Snarky – My MIL Stole a $500 Wedding Present From Me
Dear Snarky, I know my mother-in-law stole one of my wedding presents and I’m about to lose it. She volunteered to take the gifts people left at our wedding home with her for my husband […]
Cleaning Up With Good Memories
I’ve been thinking a lot about my parents lately. They have both been gone for more than five years so I’ve passed the gut punch mourning period that is filled with longing for just one […]
The Bachelorette Provides Some Unique Father/Daughter Bonding Time
There are many journeys one takes as a parent. Some you’re prepared for like dealing with a cranky toddler or a moody teenager. But then there are other things that happen where you feel like […]
Ageless Summer – Count Me Out
Stop what you’re doing and listen, really listen. Do you know what the faint sound you’re hearing is? The long anguished and exasperated sigh of women who qualify for an AARP discount reacting to the […]
Bionic Beagle
Has veterinarian care drastically changed or have pet owners? I ask myself this question every time I take my dogs in for a teeth cleaning. It’s my husband who initiates this thought process with his statement […]
Dear Snarky – A Friend’s Prank Backfires
Dear Snarky, I live in a very small town and my family owns the only grocery store in the area. (You have to drive about 50 miles to get to a Walmart.) We work with […]
Dear Snarky – My Mom is trying to be the Center of Attention at my Wedding
Dear Snarky, I’m getting married over the Labor Day weekend and I hope I don’t dis-invite my mother to the wedding. She’s gone mother of the bride bridezillla. It started with her insisting that she […]
Home Selling Lust
I’ve caught the latest ailment that’s sweeping the country and I’m not talking about the coronavirus. What I’ve got is a bad case of home selling fever. Am I selling my home? No, but that […]
Bad Mood Rising
I’m currently perplexed. Granted, I spend a great deal of time in a perplexed state due to my over abundant curiosity about things that are usually none of my business. But before you judge me […]
Dear Snarky I Just Found Out I’m Dating My Mom’s EX-Husband’s Son
I’m a junior in college and I’ve been dating a wonderful guy for about six months. Recently, I met my boyfriend’s mom and dad and they were super nice but the dad asked me a […]
Camped Out
Something alarming has happened to me. I have discovered that my husband has been if not exactly hiding than at the very least has been somewhat secretive about a new desire. Honestly, maybe it’s not a […]
Turning Your Flaws into Parenting Tips
Do you hear that? It’s the sound of a mother posting another heartfelt quote about parenting on social media. Tis the season for everything from inspirational ditties to novellas about the joy of parenting due […]
Fenced In by Cleaning
I’ve met my white whale. I realize over the many years of writing this blog I’ve said that at least five times. In fact, I went deep into the archives and my last white whale […]
A Moving Story
There are few things in this world that I excel at but if I am going to toot my own horn I will say packing, moving, unpacking, and cleaning would be number five on my […]
Snarky in the Suburbs Trouble in Texas is Now an Audiobook!
I’m beyond excited that the book I wrote six years ago is now an AUDIOBOOK! This book means a lot to me. I dedicated it to my parents because the mother and father characters in […]
Snarky in the Suburbs 