What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas and thank goodness for that. I say this because paying $13.75 for a can of Diet Coke doesn’t need to become a trend that infiltrates the rest of America.
I was recently in Las Vegas as a tag along on one of my husband’s business trips. It’s a city that I haven’t visited since 2014 and that was for one of my daughter’s dance competitions. To this day that still perplexes me. A three-day event for children being held at a casino seems rather odd. Yet apparently, I’m in the minority on this issue. I know this because back in the day when I expressed this thought among some other dance moms I was called “uptight,” “no fun,” and “Amish.”
Oh well, back to my most current trip which found me awash in new curiosities and conundrums. Starting with why are there so many mirrors? There are mirrored walkways, mirrored walls, mirrored ceilings, mirrored halls, even buildings seemingly clad in mirrors. You cannot escape your image. It’s as if you’re being haunted by your reflection.
Now if you’re perfect looking I can see how this would be an unfettered delight but if you’re not exactly super model material it can be frightening. And let’s be honest most of the people enjoying Vegas are not in the “model” category.
I, being solidly “not model” material, literally experienced the five stages of grief over being continually subjected to my reflection. At first, I went into denial. As in surely, I don’t look that bad. Then I got angry at the idiots that thought acres and acres of mirrors were a solid design choice.
After I worked through that I made a bargain with myself that I would not eat any more macarons the entire trip as if somehow that would instantly help alter the reflection staring back at me. My no macarons edict threw me into a whirlwind of sadness which birthed the conspiracy theory that perhaps all the mirrors are intended to make people feel dejected, so they gambled more to cope with their misery.
Finally, I just accepted that if I wanted to remain happy in Vegas I needed to entertain the lie that every single reflective surface in the city was akin to a fun house mirror and distorted my image. (I’m happy to report that embracing this delusional thinking worked.)
Yet, the whole mirror conspiracy was not the most mind boggling of my trip. It was the fact that there’s a Louis Vuitton store, known for its high-end handbags, approximately every 50 yards along the Las Vegas strip. They were so close together you could throw a counterfeited Vuitton Neverfull tote from one store to the next.
I was so intrigued by the plethora of Louis Vuitton stores that I felt I had to investigate. This proved not to be an easy task. Starting with the fact that I had to stand in a line and wait to go into the store. I’m sure this is a marketing ploy because the stores aren’t crowded. Perhaps it was to induce the feeling that you have to be deemed worthy of breaching the inner sanctum of paying way too much for a purse.
Once inside I couldn’t get anyone to answer my question of why so many stores that are so close together? In fact, the response I received to my query was a visit from security. (Alas, this was not the first time I’ve encountered security at a Louis Vuitton establishment. Years ago in Sacramento I got in trouble for bringing a Diet Coke into the store.) But I did have a woman shopping share with me that she and her friends were on a “walking tour” of all the Vuitton stores on the strip and it was “ah-mazing.”
Hmm, I don’t know if I agree. The good news is they don’t have to walk far but ugh all the mirrors they’ll have to endure.
Roll the dice and win when you read a Snarky book!!! 🎲 There’s Empty a “laugh till you cry” menopausal revenge adventure. (Yes, you read that right menopausal revenge. It’s a thing.) Back to School is a hysterical read for any mom who’s experienced elementary school parent drama. Trouble in Texas is a tall tale of what happens when a daughter lets her septuagenarian mom enlist her in a wild scheme that could end up with both of them in jail. And Four Seasons of Snarky is full of short stories (perfect for the person who doesn’t have much time to read) that feature tales of suburban revenge. 😉
Please click this Amazon link to experience the fabulousness. 😘 www.amazon.com/stores/Sherry-Claypool-Kuehl/author/B00S5WL2N4