I’ve been putting if off for a good two years and now the end is near. It’s time for me to retire my one-piece swimsuit that I purchased when Obama was president. Now, you might […]
Category: Rants
Losing and Finding My Hallmark Holiday Movie Joy
Something was wrong in my holiday universe and I’m not talking about the coronavirus. It’s always omnipresent. But COVID-19 aside something felt off. For the first time in two decades, I just wasn’t feeling it […]
Warning: Decorating for Christmas Can be Hazardous to your Health
It’s over. Now all that’s left is for me to continue applying Icy Hot to my back and taking a regimen of ibuprofen so I can soon walk, perhaps even bend over, without uttering a […]
Counting Steps While Going Deep on Smart Toasters
So, it’s come to this – I’m now obsessed with footsteps. Specifically, the number of steps I take every day. Yes, I know this is so early aughts the whole step counting thing. But my […]
Lawn Therapy
Being erroneously told when we bought our house a decade ago that “yards here don’t need a sprinkler system” is on page 16 in my “Big Book of Complaining.” Long time readers have heard me […]
I’m Not an Expert But I Play One on the Internet
A week or two ago I wrote about how the most fundamental of science knowledge and common sense seems to be eluding a significant swath of the U.S. population. Mainly because so many people are […]
Embracing the Incognito Freedom
I’m on a mask roll. Yes, I realize that I recently wrote about masks so let’s call this “Masks – the Sequel.” I feel it is my duty, nay let’s make that my calling, to […]
Cheez-It Parenting in an Extreme Parenting World
Help, I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole and I can’t get out. Worse, I don’t even know if I want to get out which is quite frankly embarrassing because I feel like I’m in the […]
Home Alone (But Not For Long Enough)
It has been 77 days. 77 long, long days. But it has finally happened. I’m alone in my home. Blissfully alone. Ah, the sounds of silence because what I’m not hearing is someone on a […]
Can a Patriot Rescue Us from Quarantine Brain?
The word patriot is not what it used to be. A mere five years ago if someone was called a patriot I would assume they were talking about a Paul Revere-esque figure and the whole, […]
Covidiots
When we make it through the other side of this Covid-19 nightmare I’m hoping future generations won’t look back and say, “What a bunch of idiots.” Because that’s what I’m thinking right now – idiots. […]
Sprinkling Our Outrage
The human brain is fascinating. It lets us conveniently forget unsettling facts and allows us to process information in a way that shields us from thinking too deeply or even logically. My current deep thoughts […]
The Yuck Factor of Flying is Getting Worse
When did we become a society devoid of being cognizant of our surroundings? And what has happened in the past decade to give people the mistaken belief that they possess a super power and are […]
Writing Can Get Pretty Ugly
*Note: I write a weekly opinion column for the Kansas City Star. Some of the stuff I muse about is a little more political in nature than I what share on this blog and by […]
My Appliances Hate Me
“They don’t make things like they used to.” Now, congratulate me for officially sounding old. Don’t worry it won’t hurt my feelings because my kids have been roasting me for a week about “channeling their […]
Furniture Shopping With My Husband -Perhaps My Worst Idea Ever
If someone gave me the choice of being stabbed in the cornea with a fondue fork or going furniture shopping with my husband, trust me I’d pick the fondue fork/cornea combination hands down. I […]
Dear Half Wits
This is in response to the more than 147 and counting lame emails I have received about the post I wrote about Miley Cyrus. My biggest take away after reading all of the less than […]
I Am Not a Crack Whore
Play-dates, as we all know, are a way of life. The lucky mom is the one with their kid at someone else’s house. Ahh – it’s a few more hours of precious freedom. When you move […]
If I Were the Supreme Ruler of Suburbia . . .
Girls who make that ridiculous “Duck Face” while taking “selfies” would experience a 48 hour facial paralysis where their lips would stay frozen in “Duck Face” mode. Teaching them that parents who pay upwards of […]
3 Things I Learned at Target on New Year’s Eve
Like any good middle-aged, middle class female I’m at Target on New Year’s Eve on a quest to pick through the last of the holiday clearance. It’s in these hallowed four aisles of discount Christmas […]
HGTV You’re Killing Me
Plagued by guilt because I haven’t posted the end to Snarky Saves the World just yet here is little something new in the form of a post I did for The Detailed Decorator site last month. […]
Rantober
In a shock to no one I’m ranting again. My Halloween candy stash has been forcibly removed from my home. At first I thought it would be a good idea. A Pre-Halloween cleanse, if you […]
Snarky’s Guide to Hosting An Event
Ah, summer, a brief respite from the flurry of fund-raising events that will soon start clogging my fall calendar. Do I attend all these events because I am the essence of popularity? Um no. I […]
If Loving Santa is Wrong Then I Don’t Want to be Right
I love Santa Claus. He’s my kind of guy. Chunky, yet self-assured. A lover of Coca Cola products. Jolly, outgoing and immensely kind – making him a perfect foil to my less than positive demeanor. He has […]
In Praise of the Unromantic Marriage 😍
As females we are all raised on the myth of romance. As we grew from girls into young woman we all went in search of the intangible feeling of excitement and ardor that romance promised. […]
Does This Store Make My Butt Look Big?
You would think after suffering through four months of wearing a swimsuit I would be looking forward to shopping for clothing that covered up my body from abs to ankle. Sorry make that flab to […]
The Mom Bomb
There are friends and then there are Friends. I can count my Friends on one hand. These are the people who just don’t have your back. They have your back and are covering it with […]
Beauty Crimes
I’ve found something that is harder and more uncomfortable than having the “human reproductive system” talk with your daughter. It’s explaining and justifying your decades of beauty crimes. On my daughter’s last trip to grandma’s […]
Snarky Gets Cranky
Today has not been a good day. Usually I would self medicate with chocolate, but because I spent the better part of my weekend at a water-park I feel I must say no to brownies. I would also, at this time, like to offer my sincerest and heartfelt apologies to anyone who was in visual range of me in a swimsuit at Ocra’s World of Waves. My substitute today for chocolate will be excessive ranting. Because I’m home alone and have no one to share my bad temper with you, special friend, will get to experience Extreme Cranky Turbo Edition.
Hands Off My Hair Follicle Fund!
I’m no stranger to making sacrifices. After all, I drove a used mini-van for more than a decade. So, when my husband decided that our family needed to economize (again) I was all for it. […]
Snarky in the Suburbs 