Dear Snarky,
I’m having a real problem with the mother of one of my daughter’s friends. Last week I was driving my car while I had a lollipop in my mouth. I had been to the dry cleaners and they had a basket with lollipops so I took one.
Unbeknownst to me this mother saw me driving and assumed the lollipop stick was a cigarette and now she says her daughter is no longer allowed in our home or car because I’m a smoker and she won’t have her child exposed to cigarette smoke.
I would understand this if I was a smoker but I’m not and I told her over and over again it was a lollipop stick. She refuses to believe me and now my daughter who is in the fourth grade is very upset that her friend can no longer come to our house because of a lollipop stick.
How do I get this woman to believe me so my daughter’s friendship isn’t ruined.
Signed, It was a Cherry Tootsie Pop
Dear Tootsie Pop,
Here’s the bad news – your daughter needs to make a new friend because the Tootsie Pop police is never going to believe you and honestly, she needs to F off because by not believing you she’s calling you a liar.
Also, I wouldn’t want my daughter to be around someone who thinks I’m a liar. I’m not saying your child should exclude this little girl from her life but the friend base needs to be expanded.
I can, sort of, I guess see how someone could mistake a lollipop stick for a cigarette while driving past another car at say 40 mph but if I asked a friend if they were smoking and they said no I was enjoying a Tootsie Pop I would believe them. I wouldn’t go scorched earth.
The fact that this mom went from 0 to 100 means that you’re never going to be able to change her mind so don’t waste any more time trying. Just chalk it up to “weird things that happened to me during my parenting journey.”
That said just to tweak this woman I might be tempted to show up at school functions while enjoying a Tootsie Pop.
****
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