Dear Snarky – I was invited to a virtual bridal shower that I think is a shakedown for cash

Dear Snarky,

A sorority sister sent me an Evite to a virtual wedding shower. The Evite suggests that instead of gifts we Venmo her money. The reason she gave is that she didn’t want to put a “strain on the delivery service by having people send gifts.”

She says she’s throwing herself a virtual shower because she still “wanted to celebrate her love” and we shouldn’t let the coronavirus “steal our joy.”

The kick in the ass is that this woman’s wedding isn’t until February of 2021. Who throws themselves a bridal shower almost a year before the wedding? My Evite RSVP was that I wasn’t “going” to her virtual shower because I didn’t appreciate the “shake down” for cash 13 months before her wedding.

I guess because people are bored the whole thing blew up and the bride played the boo hoo card and said that I’ve “devastated her and her character.”

Who’s right here?

Signed, Guess who got disinvited from the wedding

Dear Disinvited,

The short answer is not only are you right but you’re RIGHT IN ALL CAPS. The bride has no character to devastate because her behavior is reprehensible. Who during a pandemic where people have lost their jobs or are worried about their jobs and, oh yeah, NOT DYING, sends out a virtual shower invitation asking for cash? Never mind that the wedding is a freaking year away.

To further add to my arsenal of hostility is the wording of the Evite where the bride acts like she’s doing the Lord’s work by pointing out the cash is good because she doesn’t want to “put a strain on the delivery service.” Yeah, right. Cue the world’s largest eye roll. Cash is good because she’s a greedy witch.

As for the whole “steal our joy” B.S. – by “steal our joy” does she mean let’s use a worldwide health crisis to make some money?

Consider yourself lucky to be disinvited. This bride sounds she’s riding shotgun on the Hot Mess Express. Trust me on this – the wedding will be an epic train wreck.

If you have a question for Dear Snarky – advice with an attitude – email me at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com. 😉

 

 

 

 

Dear Snarky I Went to a Fundraiser Disguised as a Wedding

Dear Snarky,

I’m sure I just got robbed. My friend got married last weekend and it was a joke. She had 4 bridal showers where I had to pony up a present and then I go to her wedding for 200 people and it’s an outdoor ceremony in a field off the interstate. If that doesn’t suck enough for you the reception consisted of 2 picnic tables with lemonade, ice tea, something called a popcorn bar and a doughnut cake.

Then the happy couple had the nerve to ask for donations to help pay for their honeymoon and they passed around a basket.

I’m all for people not going into debt to get married, but I feel like I’ve been scammed. I dropped like $500 on shower gifts and a wedding present and all I get in return is popcorn, a doughnut hole and mosquito bites. Am I wrong to feel taken advantage of?

Signed, Majorly Ticked Off

Dear Ticked Off,

There is no wedding math where the number of showers you attend creates an algorithm about how fancy a wedding should be. For example, attending four showers doesn’t equal a wedding reception with an open bar and a sit-down dinner.

That said, I think a bride and groom hosting a wedding for 200 people should be thinking, just a little, about their guest’s comfort and experience. I’m not going to lie popcorn and a donut hole sounds grim. But, back in the day people got married and the reception consisted of cake, punch and for some reason always Jordan almonds. (Just why on that? Please someone tell me.)

In fact, I was almost going to give the couple a pass, but then I got to the part in the letter where you mentioned that the bride and groomed asked for honeymoon donations and I was aghast. A wedding is not your own personal fundraiser and this couple’s character sounds a little gift grabby.

So, based on that I’m going to say you go right ahead and feel justified wallowing in your anger while you scratch those mosquito bites.

*If you have a question for Dear Snarky – 21st Century Advice With an Attitude 😉 – email me at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com or PM on my Snarky FB page.