Dear Snarky,
I can’t believe I’m writing this but our daughter just announced that she wants to become a Catholic nun. To say that my husband and I are stunned is the world’s biggest understatement.
First, we aren’t Catholic. So, she’s had no exposure to the Catholic church. I don’t even think she’s ever been to a mass. Second, my 19-year-old daughter smokes and I’m not talking cigarettes, drinks and enjoys lots of male companionship. Third, I can’t remember the last time she graced a church with her presence.
When she told my husband and I about becoming a nun we just both kind of laughed and that made her really mad and now she’s staying with a friend while she prepares for the “sisterhood.”
Do we just let this happen? I know she’s legally an adult but I’m afraid she’s making a horrible mistake. Not that nuns aren’t wonderful but as a mother I know this is not for her.
Signed, Seriously Concerned
Dear Concerned,
Well, this is truly a first because I never thought I would receive a Dear Snarky letter about nuns. Since I’m not Catholic I reached out to a priest (I don’t know any nuns.) to get some information about how demanding it is to become a nun. Short answer – it’s an arduous journey.
First and foremost, your daughter will have to become a Catholic. This involves a major commitment that involves classes and courses of study.
Then one can’t just decide to be a nun, you have to prove yourself and according to the priest I talked with, most religious communities require a woman to have a college degree or some kind of professional work experience.
This is because being a nun is a serious undertaking and they want only serious Catholic women to enter the sisterhood.
Now, if I were you I would reach out to your daughter and apologize for laughing and tell her you support her journey. Please specify that this doesn’t mean financial support but moral support and encouragement.
Because here’s the deal I don’t think your daughter is really serious about becoming a nun. I think something else is at play here and it could be manipulating you and your husband.
That said, also check with her and make sure she’s not experienced any trauma that might have led to this decision.
Good luck and I sincerely hope your daughter finds what she’s looking for.
**************
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