I think my sister is hurting people and she is a f’ing liar. A couple of years ago her Instagram started taking off and now combined with TikTok she’s got what she calls her “tribe.” Her current goal is to become an influencer. The problem is my sister portrays her life as flawless and trust me it’s not.
She posts stuff and I’ll text her and ask, “Who are you?” Her marriage is a dumpster fire yet she acts like it’s a romcom although she’s been separated from her husband for eight months and has moved back in with our parents. Her kids are ignored unless they’re being used as Instagram props and she’s actually gone so far as to pose in front of a random rich person’s house and pass it off as the one she lives in.
All of this isn’t even why I have an issue with her. I mean it’s one thing to have a pretend life on social media but when you start giving out advice based on your “perfect life” to your followers, well that’s just f’d up. The thing that pushed me over the edge was when she started handing out marriage advice. OMFG! My sister and her husband both cheated on each other.
Just so you know this letter isn’t because I’m jealous of my sister. She’s 10 years older than me and I’m still in college so it’s not like I want her lifestyle. What I do want is for her to understand how damaging social media can be and to shut down her “advice.” What do you think the best way to do this is? I think I need to threaten to start commenting that her stuff is fake AF.
Signed, Ready to Go Off
Dear Ready to Go Off,
The irony is not lost on me that you’re writing to a person on social media who gives advice for the best way to get your sister to stop giving advice on social media. So let’s just move on from that awkwardness.
First, I think you should forget about commenting on your sister’s posts. She’ll just block you and continue on her merry way. What you need to do is realize that your sister is probably in love with her social media persona and that it provides a crap ton of distraction from the problems in her real life. This means she’s not going to hear you out and go, “Yeah, you’re so right. I’m totally going to pull back.”
My best guess is you’re going to need to scare her a little bit and let her know that sooner or later people will discover that she’s totally working a bogus vibe. Also, appeal to her ego and lust for followers by pointing out that people gravitate towards a marriage on the rocks story so if she comes clean about her marital woes it will probably get her even more followers.
Sadly, I’m sorry to say, that I don’t think there is much you can do to convince your sister to stop perpetrating a false persona. Social media is an addiction for many people and it’s going to take time (if ever) for her to get weary of the attention and playing the game of “look at my perfect life.”
So, have a heart-to-heart talk with your sister, share your concerns and then move on. You don’t need to continue this journey down your sister’s social media rabbit hole any further.
*If you have an issue that needs a little Dear Snarky input email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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