Dear Snarky,
I’m confused what is going on with my fiancé right now. He keeps on pushing back our wedding date. We were originally scheduled to get married in February of 2021 but he wanted to change it to the summer of 2021 so we wouldn’t be getting married during flu season. Now he wants to wait until 2022 to make sure everyone can get a COVID vaccine before the wedding.
I don’t get it. We had always planned to have a very small wedding so it’s not like it’s a crowd size issue thing. I also told him I was against waiting till 2022 to get married and would be open to the wedding being just the two of us so we wouldn’t have to worry about COVID but whatever option I offer up he shoots down.
My mother says I need to “read the handwriting on the wall” and break the engagement but she never liked my fiancé much so I feel her advice is not very open minded. What do you think?
Signed, 2022 Bride
Dear Bride,
I’m going to give you the exact same advice I would give my daughter. This whole marriage thing (ahem) doesn’t look good. I say this because it certainly sounds like you fiancé is finding every reason he can to postpone your wedding.
This is when you need to quit laying in bed at night re-examining everything he says, second guessing your feelings and hemming and hawing and just ask him the hard question – Do you still want to still marry me?
If he says yes then follow up with, “Would you be up for the two of us getting married on our original February date?”
If he can’t answer this question with another enthusiastic YES and proceeds to make excuses then I think you know he’s doesn’t really want to marry you.
For sure he may like being with you, he may even love you but he does not want to make a life long commitment to you.
I suggest breaking it off with him pronto. You gain nothing but misery and disappointment staying with a man who not only doesn’t want to marry you but also doesn’t have the stones to be honest with you about his feelings and instead throws up one excuse after another.
Hear me loud and clear on this – You. Deserve. Better.
If you have a question for Dear Snarky – advice with an attitude – email me at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com. 😉
Snarky in the Suburbs 