Dear Snarky – I Went Off On Some Cheating Swim Moms

Dear Snarky,

I feel like my son got ripped off at a neighborhood swim meet and now I’m being called names because I complained about it.

My son is seven and a super fast swimmer. He hasn’t lost all summer. At his last meet he swam his best time ever for the breaststroke. We were 100% positive he had won. 

Long story short – after all the heats he ended up not only not winning, but not even placing! That is very weird and to make it weirder I heard some of the moms who volunteer at the swim meet (i.e. Basically run it. They sit at a picnic table and tabulate the times as they are handed in) talking about how since it was the last meet of the summer they wanted to make sure some of the kids that hadn’t gotten a first place ribbon finally got one.

I went off on these moms. I told them it’s a swim meet. The fastest kid wins. It’s not about making everyone feel good and how dare they mess with the times.

Now, I’m being called a “crazy swim mom” and it has been suggested I not attend the swim team banquet this week. Am I not right? Shouldn’t it be about the times? And should I go to the banquet.

 Signed, The Fastest Wins

Dear Fastest,

To use a race analogy – it’s a marathon not a sprint. Pace yourself woman.

Yes, I think in a swim meet the fastest swimmer should always win. If these moms wanted to end the season on a feel good note then special ribbons should have been given for best flutter kick or something. If they did indeed mess with the times then they are huge a holes (and a part of me wonders if maybe it was their children that got the blue ribbons that day).

BUT your child is just seven and many more injustices are headed your way in the journey that is motherhood. So, pick your battles. (I can’t stress this advice enough.) Mixing it up with some idiotic moms at the last neighborhood swim meet of the summer doesn’t seem worth it. It’s over. Sure, you got to rant, but trust me, it was a wasted effort.

I suggest your family goes to the swim banquet and attempts to have a good time. If anyone says something to you just smile and share that you can’t wait for next year. (That will have them worrying.) Meanwhile, I’d check into finding another swim program because I wouldn’t want to waste another summer on a team where volunteers think it’s okay to jack with the rules. 

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