The Case of the One Upper

dear_snarky_logoDear Snarky,

 I need your advice about how to handle a person who is a constant one upper. This woman drives me crazy no matter what you say, what kind of story you’re sharing she’s got to get in there and one up you. Don’t tell me not to talk to her because believe me I avoid her as best I can but she always seems to insert herself into any and all conversations. Help me before I punch this woman in the face.

 Signed, Okay I wouldn’t punch anyone but I’m really frustrated.

Dear Okay,

The One Upper is a blight on any conversational landscape and I fear their numbers are growing.  Adding to the problem is this personality type also exhibits “Know It All” syndrome so no matter what you say this person knows more than you and has a better story.

My advice is two-fold; if the One Upper is a co-worker try to have any conversations with other work buddies outside the office or via text or email that way you’re protected from the One Upper interruptus. I know you maybe thinking this is crappy, non confrontational advice but trust me today’s one upping co-worker could be tomorrow’s boss so you’ve always have to be mindful of covering the old backside.

If the One Upper is an extended family member it’s your duty to tell them they have a problem. Just like we count on people we’re related to give us a heads up on things like exceedingly long nose hairs it’s also required that you intercede for the rest of humanity and tell the One Upper to stand down and shut it. They need to hear it and maybe more than once. Trust me a grateful nation thanks you.

If you have a problem for Dear Snarky – 21st Century Advice With an Attitude – please contact me at 

8 thoughts on “The Case of the One Upper

  1. lori says:

    Love this!!! Great advice…especially on the CYA in regard to a possible, future boss. As far as family, who wouldn’t want to straighten out that crazy relative. They ruin every party.

    Blog on, Snark On and serve it up, with a side of sarcasm 😉

  2. pam says:

    The only thing worse than the one upper is the contradictorian. You say it’s black, they say it’s white. You say you love something, they hate it. You know this type. They Never agree with anything you say. Impossible to have a conversation.

  3. Sharon says:

    I would have to be passive aggressive and tell the “one upper” about my problem with this women who always interrupts and one ups and then wait and see what her recommendation is. Devious perhaps-Do I care? No! I have embraced my dark side.

  4. evanatiello says:

    When I was faced with the same dilemma (there’s one in every town) I wrote her into my suburban suspense novel. Sweet revenge! She ended up being one of my favorite characters, mainly because she practically wrote herself. I gotta say, she gave me some good material. Turn lemons into a Margarita!

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