Dear Snarky – Happy Trampy Halloween

Dear Snarky,

My daughter is 13 and a group of her friends want to go as devils for Halloween. I have zero problem with her being a devil. What I do have a problem with is that the costumes the girls want to buy are highly inappropriate. It seems once you start wearing women’s or junior sizes in Halloween costumes there’s not much to choose from that’s not sexy. Is there anyway out of this without me being the mean mom and saying no?

Signed, Witch of a Mom

Dear Witch,

You are experiencing what I call the tramp-a-doddle-doing of Halloween. Once your daughter ages out of and fitting into Disney princess or fairy costumes it is slim pickings in the not slutty department. I’m not kidding here. Last year I saw a sexy pumpkin costume. How on earth do you make a pumpkin costume sexy you might be asking? Easy. This pumpkin outfit had an almost shear front. I’m going to let you use your imagination for what body parts became the “eyes” of the pumpkin. This is just one of the many reasons why I recommend two wardrobe items that will magically turn an overtly sexy costume into a full coverage extravaganza – the long sleeve black t-shirt and black leggings. They provide head to toe concealment that would make the Amish proud.

Tell your daughter she was to wear the leggings and T-shirt combo under her costume so she stays warm trick- or-treating and that’s the ONLY WAY you’re going to let her leave the house in a devil costume. Also, talk with the other moms get them on board the black T and leggings band wagon. Sure, there’s always one mom who won’t get it and have zero problem with her daughter being 12 going on 21 but that’s her problem not yours.

Happy Halloween!

If you have a question for Dear Snarky email her at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com or private message her on Facebook at Snarky in the Suburbs.

10Comments

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1

Vail on October 14, 2013 at 12:45 pm
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I went with a long sleeve black shirt combined with black skirt for my daughter. Then I just added the devil wings, black hose, horns, pitchfork and tail. This year she’s going to be a witch. Same shirt and skirt, but with striped hose, witches hat, broom and other accessories. Best of all she can wear the skirt and shirt to school and I’m not stuck with an outfit that will get one use. I can also swap the accessories with other moms and not have to worry about it fitting their kid.
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  snarkyinthesuburbs on October 14, 2013 at 2:41 pm
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  Genius!
3

Linda Chandler LaFever on October 14, 2013 at 12:55 pm
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this is exactly why I made my kids’ Halloween costumes until they were too old to trick or treat. Plus the fact that I wasn’t going to pay the kind of $$ they were wanting for a few small pieces of badly constructed, fabric-ish stuff.

For what it’s worth, leggings are one of the best things that ever came out of the brains of designers.
4

Hayley on October 14, 2013 at 1:20 pm
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My daughter was a devil a few years ago. She wore a red thermal shirt with red leggings. And then I bought the horns and pitchfork (I forgot the tail so we pinned her brother’s red soccer sock to her butt). Her special treat was that I sprayed red hair spray into her hair. It was tasteful with full coverage and probably cost me $10. Plus she still wears the thermal shirt and the leggings as separates.
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  snarkyinthesuburbs on October 14, 2013 at 2:40 pm
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  Awesome!
6

applemoma on October 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm
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Snarky, once again practical and cool advice. brava!
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  snarkyinthesuburbs on October 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm
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  Thanks! 🙂
8

Missy on October 14, 2013 at 7:44 pm
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Flapper costumes are cute and in style thanks to the Great Gatsby movie. Going as risque in the past is appealing but you don’t have to buy into the Sexy Maid Sexy Pirate Sexy etc. stuff.
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  snarkyinthesuburbs on October 14, 2013 at 9:11 pm
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  Amen and I love the flapper idea.
10

Jennifer on November 7, 2013 at 1:00 pm
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A gentleman neighbor calls the afore mentioned sexy costume clad middle schoolers…wait for it…prost-i-tots. All that description, just one word. I loved it. I use it.