My girlfriends and I are really angry over how a friend treated us. This friend dresses like a nun and as a gift to her we wanted to treat her to a surprise make over. She thought she was coming to my apartment for a movie and wine, but instead we plucked her eyebrows, fixed her hair, applied self tanner and put make up on her which she never uses. We also introduced her to a Spanx push up bra.
When all this was going on she seemed okay, but then she started ghosting us. She didn’t answer our texts or phone calls. Finally she sent us a group text saying that we made her feel uncomfortable and hurt her feelings by criticizing her appearance
Umm, really because we were trying to be good friends and now she’s being ungrateful. Should we tell her off or apologize to just get the whole mess over with?
Signed, Make Over Madness
Dear Make Over,
I get it. You and your friends think you have great taste (emphasis on the word think) and because of your stylish swagger believe that everyone should embrace your fashion aesthetic. But maybe you look like Snookie from her Jersey Shore days (sorry it was the self tanner comment that took me in that direction) and your friend has a very traditional appearance like the Duchess of Cambridge. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t look good. She just doesn’t look like you.
Also did you ever consider that your friend maybe happy with her appearance? That she has no problem rocking the no make up look and that she likes to keep her chest, shall we say, a little less perky.
You showed zero regard for what your friend wanted and were more about what you wanted – an ambush makeover. That’s good for a reality TV show, but no so awesome for maintaining a friendship. So yes, you most definitely need to apologize. And the next time you want to give someone a makeover fight the urge and take your next victim, oops sorry I meant friend, for a mani-pedi instead.
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