Dear Snarky,
My mother is ruining our family and embarrassing all of us and she doesn’t seem to care. It started a year ago when my parent’s got divorced. My mother had been depressed for about two years and she finally divorced my dad after he cheated on her a lot.
According to my mom she “walked out of a 25-year marriage with the clothes on her back” and was in her words “poor.” Then about four months ago she seemed different. She started giving a shit about her appearance and was wearing cute clothes and finally getting the gray in her hair taken care of. The strangest thing was when she went on a vacation to Florida by herself.
My mom never does anything by herself and if she ever was going to take a vacation I don’t know why she wouldn’t at least take her kids and grandkid with her. It was also so weird that she had money to spend because I knew her job doesn’t pay that much money.
The mystery was solved when some friends of mine at work started taking about some hot grandma on OnlyFans and when I took a look at this grandma it was my mother (in a ridiculous blonde wig)!!!!!!!
(Editor’s note: Here’s a brief explanation of OnlyFans from Wikipedia. Content creators can earn money from users who subscribe to their content—the “fans”. It allows content creators to receive funding directly from their fans on a monthly basis as well as one-time tips and the pay-per-view feature.)
My mom wasn’t naked or anything, but she has a collection of feet and bathing suit shots on her OnlyFans accountant. I was so embarrassed when I saw it that I had to leave work early and take a half sick day.
I went straight to my mom’s house and confronted her and she was kind of a bitch to me. She told me that she was a single adult with grown children and she could do whatever she wanted. She actually seemed proud about being on OnlyFans and said for the first time in her life she was making good money and it was helping get in better financial shape after the divorce.
I threatened to expose what she was doing to our extended family and my dad and she just laughed and said, “Have at it.”
This made me so mad I told her I was going to get on OnlyFans and she told me to “live my life.”
I followed through on my threat and told our family and it didn’t matter one bit to my mom because she’s still on the site. What can I do to get her to realize she’s hurting the ones she loves with this new “business?”
Signed, Shocked
Dear Shocked,
Have you ever stopped to think that what your mother does with her life is 100 percent none of your business? She’s not breaking the law and as an adult she can live her life how she sees fit. The fact that you’re embarrassed by how she’s living it is your problem not your mother’s.
From your letter I gather that your mom has had a rough couple of years dealing with depression, a cheating husband and then enduring the pain that comes with a divorce. The fact that it now seems like she’s possibly happy is a good thing.
I find it interesting that you have chosen to not focus on your mother’s well-being and instead seem to only be concerned about your feelings and how her OnlyFans account affects you. Also, the fact that you felt the need to follow through on your threat to tell your entire family says a whole lot more about your character than your mother’s.
Granted it’s a lot for a daughter to process. I will give you that. But the smart move here is to keep the lines of communication open with your mother. She’s probably a lot more fragile than you think. After all, she’s been through an emotional tsunami and she needs a daughter who shows her love not judgement. (And doesn’t get her panties in a twist when her mother dares to take a vacation without her adult children.) 🙄
****
It’s no OnlyFans but I DO have a new book out and I would love, love, love for you take a look at it by clicking on the Amazon link. 😍
Snarky in the Suburbs 