My Ode to Spring or “Why Is It Snowing in the Morning and 75 Degrees In the Afternoon?”

I’m worried about the long-term memory capabilities of almost every resident in the my hood. It seems most midwest peeps have forgotten that springtime in the plains brings a mercurial flux in weather conditions. Hot to cold, cold to hot. Snowing in the morning, sweating in the afternoon. Consider spring like a hungry, sleep deprived teenager during finals week  – mood swings a plenty. Yes, it’s annoying to go from flip-flops to boots in a 12 hour time span, but that’s just spring’s way of blessing us with something to talk about.

This is one of the reasons I love spring. As a season it’s a giver. Last week’s weather was so loopy it became the ultimate conversation starter and had most of us chatting in earnest with strangers for more than the cursory three seconds it takes to say “Good (insert day part here). In fact, I consider our recent temperature roulette a city-wide team building exercise. And as an added perk the weather was wacky and riveting enough it saved all of us from going to that dark, scary, place – discussing the presidential race.

Spring is like a mother before she gets really mad. It gently nudges and reminds you to start getting things done. For instance, the climate musical chairs we’re experiencing is spring’s way of whispering, “You-hoo my sweet friend, sure you’ve got on long pants this morning, but by this afternoon it’s going to 79 degrees and short city. So, ya might want to put down the doughnut and back away from the bear claw. Don’t panic. You’ve still got time. The pools open in two months, that’s enough to do, well, not a lot, but maybe you could get rid of that swim skirt and, fingers crossed, three cellulite dimples. You can do this. Just take it one day and pastry item at a time.”

Now compare spring’s dulcet, encouraging tones to that of summer. A season best described as a three-month hot flash with occasionally bouts of tears in the form of precipitation and passive aggressive tendencies expressed via fluctuating humidity levels. Summer’s “encouragement” would be shouting, “Hey fatty, for the love of God, put down the doughnut or buy a swim moo moo.”

Advantage spring.

The springtime also lovingly prompts you that it’s time to renew the very personal relationship you have with your lawn. It doesn’t matter that you got in a big fight and broke up with your yard in October after you raked and filled up 23 bags of leaves and then two hours later it looked worse than when you started. (Curse you, wind and pin oak trees!) It doesn’t even matter that you threatened to xeriscape your entire yard and replace all the grass with gravel. Thank goodness a cooler head (winter) and your HOA bylaws prevailed. Blame all that nonsense on autumn and shake it off. Spring is here to heal that rift.

It begins by seducing you into surveying your lawn. The gentle swaying of blooming fruit trees beckon you outside. Once you’re walking every nook and cranny of your yard you’ll notice some patches of grass that need assistance. Boom! That’s all it takes to get you back out there with a bag of soil amendment and a shovel. Thus the dance of unrequited love begins anew with your lawn.

Spring is really all about love. It even helps you parent. For this is the season where you hit the wall with all your children’s activities and projects. End of the year book reports and tests, school programs, concert, performances – it all has you yearning for the sweet freedom of summer. And yet, spring knows that summer is a freedom mirage. That before you can say “let’s just all chill out do nothing” every mother will be forced to simmer in the national whine of summer, the kids’ chorus of “I’m bored” or my personal favorite, “I’m tired of the pool.”  (Seriously, how can anyone under 12 be tired of the pool? It’s the adult equivalent of saying I’m tired of margaritas.)

What spring does is give you the month of May to feel overwhelmed and overscheduled thus keeping you too busy to remember that three weeks into summer you’ll start feeling like you’re running a day camp or the cruise director of the S.S. When Is School Starting?Consider spring like an epidural. It helps blocks the pain of past summers thus you can delude yourself that it’s going to be 10 weeks of uninterrupted R&R.

So, instead of dissing spring or even being confused by it’s temperament let’s all give this season a high-five. You may have mittens on when you’re doing this or you could have on SPF 70. It’s just spring’s way of keeping you guessing.