50 Shades of Shut Up

dear_snarky_logoDear Snarky,

I have a group of married mom friends that make me blush. I’m no prude but they talk about their love lives all the time. What happened to keeping this kind of stuff private? Do you have any suggestions on how I can get them to quit with the over sharing?

Signed, My Ears Are Burning

Dear Ears,

I’m right there with you. I’d rather hear about someone’s colonoscopy than their love life. Yuck. I kind of, sort of, blame the whole 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon where it gave everyone permission to bring on the TMI. And about that TMI, my theory is the more someone talks about it the less someone is getting it – if you know what I mean. Seriously, if everything I’ve heard is to be believed then a significant portion of the middle-aged, female population is very, very, limber.

The way I see it you have 3 options.

Option 1 – Just zone out when your friends go into their adventures in bedroom land and think about your To Do list or chocolate cake which is always my zone out go to.

Option 2 –Call them out on their carnal fibbing.

Or Option 3 –  Which I think is much more fun. Make up some outlandish story that puts theirs to shame and I would suggest at least one time while telling the story to lick your lips, slowly, very slowly. This should shut them up at least for a while and give you a really good laugh.

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