I’ve been suffering from summer seasonal depression. When the thermometer hits triple digits and the humidity is so thick you feel like you’re being suffocated by a Wooly Mammoth covered in mayonnaise it’s time for me to scramble to my tried-and-true happy places as a way to cope.
Of course, air conditioning is my ultimate happy place in the summer. Next up would be the pool but currently the pool water feels as refreshing as taking a swim in a bowl of lukewarm chicken noodle soup. And not even the good kind of chicken noodle soup. I’m talking about the faux chicken soup that comes from a packet where you just add water.
This means I had to call in my mood lifting heavy hitters – the three C’s – cakes, cookies and cobblers. The yummy power a cake with delicious American buttercream frosting has to elevate my happiness quotient is unparalleled.
Yet, I found that even the three C’s weren’t getting the job done so I had to reach into my reserves. I was calling in three of my most talented bench players.
First up was assorted Facebook group pages for parents of college students. These pages are a treasure trove of feel-good endorphins. To scroll through the questions and comments proffered up by deluxe helicopter parents who are still attempting to micromanage and control every aspect of their legally adult child’s life is a balm for a weary soul.
Not only is it hilarious but it allows you to tell yourself that no matter what is happening in your life at least you’ve never emailed all of your kid’s professors and demanded a meeting to “discuss their plan for your child’s collegiate success.”
I followed that up by binge watching some shows from the “Real Housewives” franchise. What can I say? It makes me happy to see grown women fighting over cheese. It also boosts my ego to have my long-held theory that continually squeezing your body into the Lyrca hell known as shapewear can change your brain chemistry thus lowering your I.Q. by at least 10 points.
Oh, trust me I’ve done my research. If you watch the first season of each show the women seem smarter yet as the seasons progress, there is a definite downward trajectory in common sense and their intellectual capacity. The fact that the one thing all these women have in common is a shapewear addiction signals that the prolonged effect of compressing your internal organs is diminished brain function.
Rounding out my bench was my pressure washer. The joy I get from cleaning my deck with a pressure washer is substantial. It begins with the sound. The full powered hum cleanses all the bad mojo rattling around in my frontal lobe. It’s so loud even with hearing protection that it’s hard to process any deep thought or worries. Thus letting my brain enter into a relaxing mode where all I have to do is concentrate on getting the dirt out of the grooves in my white deck.
When I really feel the need to amp up the experience, I add in Dawn dish detergent to the mix. The thrill of soap suds combined with water pressure that’s at least 1,500 PSI is like watching a thousand tiny miracles happen before your very eyes.
I’m now pleased to report that a treatment plan of prolonged periods of A.C., the three C’s and my trifecta of benchwarmers has resulted in me coming out of my summer funk. Honestly, I think pressure washing while eating chocolate chip cookies was the turning point and thank goodness for that.
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Another guaranteed funk buster is staying in the cool A.C. 🧊 and reading my latest book KILLER DANCE MOM! 😍 I would be thrilled if you would click on the Amazon link and take a lookie loo. It’s a Snarky mystery so it’s a fun and fab whodunnit that takes place at a dance competition. So, lot’s of laughs and cray cray coming your way. 🤣 www.amazon.com/dp/B0C4FZTK5B
Snarky in the Suburbs 