Dear Snarky,
I’m still reeling over what happened at my wedding. I’m a 36-year-old divorced woman with two children. I recently got married for a second time to a wonderful man. The problem I’m having is with his mother and my ex-husband.
Totally without my permission my now mother in law invited my ex-husband to the wedding. She didn’t just send him an invitation, she also included a personal note telling him how it was important to his children to have him there.
So as I’m walking down the aisle one of the first things I see is my ex. My ex who was a cruel bastard to me during our marriage. It was like getting punched in the face.
I tried to not lose my cool but I was furious and got more furious when he stayed for the entire reception. I had a girlfriend ask him why he was there and he produced the invitation and the note from my new mother in law.
When my husband and I both confronted my mother in law she said she just wanted one big happy family. I was livid and told her she didn’t have the right to interfere in my wedding or life and crossed a line inviting my ex husband.
This made her get hysterical and she and my father in law left the wedding. Now, I’m two weeks back from my honeymoon and mother and father in law are still not talking to us. I need help with what my next step needs to be.
Signed, I Can’t Believe this Happened
Dear Can’t Believe
Let’s first quickly deal with your ex husband. He’s an ass and should have told you or a close friend of yours about the invitation and personal note from your MIL so you could know what she was up to. And two absolutely not attended the wedding. But you said he was a cruel bastard and he lived up to that description.
Now on to your bigger problem – your new mother in law. She’s a disaster. A sneaky, manipulative, disaster. What she did is inexcusable. Make no mistake she didn’t do it because she wanted one big happy family. She did it because she’s a nightmare and wanted to inflict pain on you on your wedding day.
My advice is that your next step needs to be to proceed with caution in dealing with this woman. She obviously doesn’t like you and you need to acknowledge that. You also shouldn’t think that any of this can be smoothed over and you’ll become friends with your mother in law. In fact – I suggest keeping her as far away from your marriage as possible. Because I can guarantee you that having her entwined in your life is a recipe for misery and a threat to the success of your new marriage.
***
Now on to happy news! 🩷 My latest book KILLER DANCE MOM is out and I would be thrilled if you would click on the Amazon link and take a lookie loo. It’s a Snarky mystery so it’s a fun and fab whodunnit that takes place at a dance competition. So, lot’s of laughs and cray cray coming your way. 😍 www.amazon.com/dp/B0C4FZTK5B
Snarky in the Suburbs 