Dear Snarky,
I’m the proud mother of a beautiful 4 month old son. I know I have a lot to be thankful for. My son is healthy and the love of my life. My problem is not my baby, but other mothers. I was in a Mommy and Me play group which is really just an excuse to get out of the house but I quit going because all the moms are so competitive especially about their babies sleeping through the night. My son has NEVER slept through the night and the moms made me feel like something is wrong with him. Do you have any advice how to handle these braggy moms and their comments?
Signed Sleepless
Dear Sleepless,
Put on your big girl Spanx and get tough. You’ve got a long road ahead of you sister. The first year of your child’s life is all about the milestones.
After the sleeping through the night marathon there’s the rolling over, sitting and pulling up Olympics. That is quickly followed by the triathlon of walking, talking and potty training. Those little mommy/baby play dates are really an excuse for a Baby Throw Down. Babies, start you engines. It’s time for Who’s the Better Baaaaaby – which loosely translates to Who’s the Better Mommy. I never won – not once. I didn’t even medal. Although, one time I thought, for sure, I would get a bronze. Fast forward to elementary school and the stakes get even higher. Who’s reading before kindergarten, who’s already doing addition and subtraction. Then, there’s always the mom that thinks her little piece of heaven is too advanced for kindergarten and needs to leap-frog directly to first grade or perhaps second grade. (Sigh) See what you have to look forward to and all this is nothing compared to high school. Two letters for you A P – as in “My child is taking 13 AP classes.” This all means you need to – right now – start practicing having confidence in yourself and your ability to be a fabulous mother. You also need repeat every day until your son leaves for college, “I will not judge my child’s success or mine based on the whopping fibs and exaggerations of other parents.”
***For all thinks wonderfully Snarky go to www.snarkygear.com where you can find T-shirts, ecards for Facebook and my brand new book – Snarky in the Suburbs Back to School. Here’s a little ditty about it:
The Spring Creek Elementary School PTA board (a coven of Mean Moms dressed in Uggs, yoga pants, and dermal filler) is up to no good. Wynn Butler (middle-aged, uncool, and not bringing sexy back) is determined to find out what’s going on. With help from her two kids, a Roomba vacuum turned mobile surveillance drone, and a few good friends, Wynn launches a covert investigation that leads to the “mother of all revenge capers” at the school’s annual Fall Festival.
If you’ve ever fantasized about smoke bombing the idiot parent who has yet to master the fine art of the school drop-off lane, or standing up and shouting, “Liar, liar, Botox on fire” during a PTA meeting, then this delicious tale of payback is for you.
To stay up-to-date on new posts and take part in my not so deep thoughts click on this Facebook link - http://is.gd/iEgnJ (That’s the abbreviated link to my FB page) or I twitter @snarkynsuburbs.
Great Advice! I have two wonderful boys ages 16 and 12. They could not be MORE OPPOSITE!!! The oldest has been so easy. He is a self disciplined, responsible academic rock star. He also has almost debilitating social shyness that I’m sure he will outgrow when he is in college. My 12 year old didn’t sleep through the night until he was almost 6 months old, HATES SCHOOL and has tons of friends and plays sports. I love them equally and completely and I do not try to live up to anyone else’s ideas of what they should be or how I should parent them. Do your own thing and don’t let anyone tell you differently!!
Can’t agree more. Pay no attention to the b’s standing behind their children telling you how perfect their children are, their husbands are, their lives are, their houses are – it’s all a sham. Everyone has problems and challenges in their lives and families – to tell you otherwise is a BIG FAT LIE. Believe in Snarky – she won’t steer you wrong!
The most important thing to know is that they are Lying!!!!!! FYI midnight to 4 is not all night long. Just look at them with pity and remind yourself that sleep deprivation is used as torture for a reason and that they have succumbed to the sleep deprived delusion that they have some type of control over what is happening. The baby will sleep through the night when the baby is ready. As soon as you begin to announce your fabulous skillz in baby sleep training, sleep regression, teething and developmental spurts will wreck havoc on your so called skillz. My son didn`t sleep through the night till he was 3. I used to publicly call people out and announce that there was no way their child was sleeping through the night. Amazingly enough at least half of the”good” sleepers recanted and some wept gratefully knowing that they were not alone in the sleep wars.
Once I was chatting with a mom during a sporting event and she mentioned that her freshman was taking 4 Honors classes. I had just confessed that my daughter was struggling in her 2 Honors classes. Later when I asked my daughter what was the 4th Honors class offered to freshmen, she told me only three are available. She went on to tell me this “4 Honors Starlet” was in regular math with her best friend. The next time I saw the mother I quizzed her about the classes. After being lied to for a second time, I decided to take the high road taking comfort in my perfectly imperfect daughter and my own parenting skills.